Why does this happen to me? And Karma

By Sukheti

Whatever comes into our lives, a wonderful love or the loss of someone or something, we usually express: Why me? I do not deserve it.

Some days the things we have worked for a long time suddenly appear to bear fruit and our days that look gray painted are transformed into a rainbow of happiness.

On the contrary, sometimes we want to live, to be or to have certain experiences that do not arrive, and this sends a part of our lives to a gray room in which we can’t see the exit. When the issue is about our relationship with others it seems that we just put our heads under the ground while we listen to a little voice that asks: why can’t I have it?

We leave the root aside for only seeing the branches…..

At some point between so much mental noises the question arises: Do not I really deserve better?

A fundamental requirement to correctly answer this question: To honestly address the origin of the “problem”

Let us be clear in this: Nothing is a problem until we “baptize” it with this name.

For many years of my life I felt that I was walking failure after failure, I lived begging for a little happiness having the feeling that everyone around me said: You don’t deserve to be happy.

After a while I started the pilgrimage through different churches, feeling that the sermons were directed at me especially and I felt happy and important…. Here I found another “problem”, every week the effect expired and I had to return for more doses of happiness.

It was not until one day reading an article of Buddhism that I found the following: “Lord Buddha, if you had to summarize his teaching in a sentence, what would this be?” He replied: Do not attached to anything”

As I said before, teaching about impermanence in my first steps in Buddhism was a total revolution in my mind, in my life. How can we live in a world with millions of people, where it also seems that the existence and value of people is measured in their possessions?

Well, without much detours, let the trips to the foreign temples and start the most arduous of tasks: The unobstructed recognition of my own temple.

Life can be as happy as we are. Meditate, making contact with the natural being that I am, which is happy takes some time. We arrive in this world being happy by nature until the first contact with pain, roughness or suffering “put us in the closet” and it is until we unlearn and reconnect with our love essence that we leave the closet again.

Aren’t the churches that was wrong, or the interpretations that those who guide them give to the doctrines. Many good Christians have enjoyed them more than once they are introduced to Buddhism.

Being conscious has led me to transform “bad” things into “good”, which is commonly said to “take the bull of the horn”.

As Dhammaji often says: “The truth is in plain sight.”

Actually I’m not a Guru, I cannot tell each other how to live their life, it took me more than 40 years to get off the mountain of crystal spheres that I built myself.

The road to truth is not comfortable, we must break everything we built around us. This does not make the ego happy, and offers continuous resistance. Still today.210843f75c9da2dc5be747c6cd6f98ef

Knowing that my happiness is in me, that all the love and compassion necessary for an entire universe dwells in my being, Leads me to a simple understanding: Not only I deserve to be happy and loved. I am happiness and love. It is I who creates happiness and unhappiness. I could not find what I was giving myself.

Karma is a term that is very clear and looks unfair to many, but our thoughts create karma, our actions create karma. Understand that everything obeys causes and conditions to make us responsible for them. Take the pan by the handle.

I have often wondered when someone expects karma to equal the score so that if a person who hurts us is hurt in return he is not creating bad karma for that person. Such thoughts certainly impact the experiences of people present in a negative way so I guess the answer might be that it does.

My understanding of Karma is that it is not an instrument of justice or revenge that are artificial concepts, since they do not exist in nature. I do not like living with the idea of ​​Karma as a consolation.

I believe that the purpose of karma is for our becoming and awakening not punishment or reward.

Our karmic debt determines what we are able to see and experience. Karma is a filter through which we experience life, can limit what we get to experience, while overcoming allows us to expand what we have to experience.

The task is to overcome the debt of karma to become the best version of ourselves. Have a better view of situations.

The bitter reality is that it is often through pain and its grieving process that we discover more of ourselves. If we are sufficiently aware and alert to this, we can discover this truth on our own. For others the cycle of karma / growth / becoming / life requires the pain of separation to push the individual.

Thoughts do not cease to arise, therefore let us not judge them. To place myself in the present, to be what I want to be, to take a positive direction based on what I have learned. Forgiveness is important, if we hurt someone to forgive us and if we were hurt we will also forgive, Forgiveness will not make what has happened to change, nor does it imply that the person who caused us harm lives in our lives, but see the positive experience And give us what we deserve without judging ourselves so we can move in the direction we want.

c949d26609b78424129b47eeb89a86b2Fear of suffering and disillusionment lead us to create shields of hate, depression, arrogance. These feelings are the product of the illusion of self-esteem that when our desires are not filled, our mind creates problems.

It’s not about what I deserve I do not deserve, its attachment or aversion to thoughts. Just letting them be, they come and go at their pleasure. Trying to fight one thought only creates another thought. Not paying attention to them makes them dissolve like clouds in the sky.

Just meditate

concentrate on your breathing

I only know.

listen and stay in peace as it is.

be the peace that you are,

accept whatever you feel

and with the time

all will  heal.

Love as a foundation

Every day I use social networks to share quotes from brothers, teachers on the way to liberation. I must confess that sometimes after a few days no matter how well-known or renowned the teacher is, the results that remain in my mind lack of substance.

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Best thing you can ever do is believe in yourself.

Sometimes I think they are obsolete and do not get me wrong, we have learned that a “truth” said by a “wise person” is like a law. For years science told us that the atom was the smallest particle of matter and now we know that it is not so that there are elementary and compound subatomic particles that may or may not be part of the atom. I do not intend to make this text a scientific talk, my interest is to remember that everything is impermanent, that it is constantly evolving. Including those rules, laws and teachings that we read, repeat, share and we make part of us.

When I share these experiences of old or new teachers, they are certainly  useful and valid in the sense that they are applicable to specific situations. At the beginning of my most serious and committed journey  in the serach for the truth I wrote a lot of my experiences and shared them on my social networks. A little for ego no doubt and a lot for the excitement of what I believed was discovering a new world. How naive, right? I was just returning home. Over time I was running out of words.
On the one hand: how to put words? How to express with concepts that which leads me to a “space” without forms. How the formless can have names or adjectives ?. On the other hand, expressing to the wind what we believe  is the truth in each moment is a responsibility. It is karmic creation. There are many ears floating there as a receiving antenna and every word expressed has an effect, if I know it.

In this process. In this journey, the only constant has been love. Love that, like many of you, has manifested itself to me in many forms. The most of them with that distorted idea of ​​love we have. And even when every day it seems that the economic and material is gaining ground even among those who preach in favor of the importance of the spiritual life, my center is rooted in love.

 

Detachment is the basis on which freedom is achieved. And true love is the invisible and most powerful force of the universe devoid of attachment. True love does not possess, gives. It always gives.

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For years science told us that the atom was the smallest particle of matter and now we know that it is not.

On this basis my beloved travel companions of the path with gratitude, humility, happiness. We do not cease to scrutinize even the darkest corners of consciousness with detachment. With love. It is interesting that the wealth of love is measured in how empty it is. Its value, its wealth is measured in everything it gives, not in what it has.

The path is for everyone, the experience is personal.
Thank you for your company in this virtual sangha.

_(“)_  Sukheti

 

Twin sisters

Meditation teachers usually call the action of sitting to meditate: practice, when the reality is that the practice is done day by day, moment by moment in all activity. When we enjoy a beautiful sunrise, but we also understand that it is a process that occurs every 24 hours as a result of the movement of rotation of the earth and with this we are also aware of its impermanence.
The practice is also done when we read about some fact that we consider unfair but we do not remain attached to the sensation that it provokes in us.
We perform the practice when making contact with another person, this offends us, hurts. Their selfish, narcissistic attitudes, etc. are only a reflection of their ignorance and how we respond is the reflection of ours, and this can be attacking also or in another case in what could be a good practice: contemplate with compassion and move forward without being chained to its manifestations.
When we sit down to meditate is like making a direct line call from you to you. Contemplating how daily practice has nourished or malnourished us. Going deep and seeing ourselves face to face. Make peace, heal what we have hurt, forgive us for what we have failed. Our essence, which is all love, purity and clarity and which over the years we sabotaged worried about how to project ourselves in front of others and abandoning ourselves.

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Meditating and practicing are twin sisters only one is made inward and the other out and in both cases you find a complete world, elements to contemplate when opening the eyes or closing them and it is the continuous practice that provides a balance where “both worlds “are manifested in a unit in which inside or outside are only words that describe periods of our state but that are part of a single universe.
When in our daily life, practice and meditation lose their name. When the concepts disappear, the freedom of our being begins. Then we are just a manifestation of love.

Metta always

Sukheti

Momentarily Disturbed

Often we are interrupted by the conditions of reality. It’s as though life has played a joke, and we don’t quite get it. There is the sense of being suddenly caught, the sting of embarassment. Maybe you get the urge to run, or to fight back. In this place one feels so compressed, and separate from any kind of comfort from your senses. You have heard the punch line before, “this is your moment of truth”. Intuitively the sense of being within you hears this. This time the voice is stronger and you stop to listen. The mind screams it’s protest; “why me, how could this happen?” This time though, you are witnessing the story. These excuses and blaming, are nothing but rants that bounce back with an empty thud. The listener is now quiet. Not by effort, but because this time like no other, the witness is more palpable, the veracity of being is felt more true than the story being told by the mind. In this moment of truth, curiosity is aroused and subdues the restless impulse in the body. Could this be what sages, saints and poets seem to invoke? Should you inquire into the possibility that you can intentionally view the passing stream of conditions without being swept into it’s currents?  Choose to be surprised by grace, rather than disturbed by truth. This time, everytime.

Look, what is a moment, what is now? Is it but a segment of time wedged between the past and future? Using only the sense of being, look to see what is “I” apart from a thought. What of you is not constructed by a thought, a belief, an idea of being? Saint Francis said that the place you are looking for is the place you are looking from. What recognition witnesses all of this? A moment is timeless, immeasurable. It is the only “place” where you really are. Here you come empty, having nothing to add. Nothing to bring. Troubles came with baggage. here, no carry on, no weight. 

Emptiness? a word, This too is a looking. Don’t take it as an idea. Just look; the words are only pointers; ‘empty of self’; ‘full of what’? There is an emptiness that is the space accomodating all that appears. All of what comes and goes; arises and disappears. All that is conceived is being born into this space. When we exit  the “nowness of just being”, in that moment, then we are “born” with the conceiving of a condition, happening as a self moving in time. Three possiblities appear, an inclination to joy, and inclination to distain, or an impulse to disregard. Whether we enjoy or suffer this birth into time and circumstance; another condition of reality ultimately asserts itself. The character of that which comes and goes, enjoyment or suffering, indicates that one cannot retain a hold on the moment. This is Dukkha. a truth in the form of words, yes. But again the ultimate looking reveals that what ever comes and goes cannot be you. Conditions that are seen, whether good or bad, are unable to sustain and fulfill happiness, because of the transient nature of reality. Dukkha means “unsatisfactory”. Not because you feel disappointed, or that nothing can be enjoyed. It means that phenomenal experiences are not capable of fulfilling even the noblest of aspirations. The consciousness manifesting as “you” is the vitality and core of your humanity. No costume of assumptions, can fully clothe this “self” in its magnitude. No acquisition or idea can fulfill the simple grace of being. It is this that is beginning to flower in you, and it is a matchless wonder that bears perennial fruit.

Kindness, DHAMMAJI

Generosity, Giving, & Gratitude

Greetings friends, to all of you any faith or none. Giving is not confined to this occasion, as we daily enjoy the gift of this life; one and all, every moment of conscious breath. As the Christian world celebrates the idea; “God so loved that he gave…” let’s all understand that you too, are a gift. You too are an incarnation of uniqueness. In Buddhism there is the idea of “Dana” that is the expression of gratitude in selfless giving.  Losing the boundaries of “myself and mine” giving becomes an ongoing attitude that the universal gift is something that passes through us. Gratitude is enjoying the divine principle in this way. Meeting the moment with an openness of heart that comes from the knowledge that all of us are sharing this same ocean of grace. Regardless of the labels, if we recognize the interconnected nature of our being, we can give birth to the sacred with every moment of gratitude. This yields the way to generosity of being that transcends the limitations of how we think of giving. So often we are concerned mainly with the transaction; the limits of our material resources, or the expectation of receiving in return. My pointing here is that we liberate the sacred principle from form and ritual by allowing the perennial goodness to continually find expression in us. Yes, continue to celebrate the sacred, give birth to it every day, in your uniqueness and gratefulness of heart. In doing so may we all enjoy the blessing of christmas without boundaries.

Kindness always, Dhammaji

Knowing fear

By Sukheti
Fear is one more of the feelings-sensations that we manifest through physical and emotional discomfort. Fear can develop based on something known or unknown but we certainly believe that we can not have control. Fear is linked to another feeling that is repulsion because fear being an unpleasant sensation by nature we want to get rid of it and automatically the repulsion arises.
In addition to repulsion, fear generates anger. That’s right, fears tend to inflate the negative qualities of what causes us fear, it is an inflation of the “I”. In effect, all those negative qualities that we see under the lens of increase are in turn our same negative qualities. Fear appears due to lack of consciousness, resulting in confusion of reality.
Not being aware that nothing is under our control prevents us from paying attention to what, although we can not control, we can perhaps take measures in this regard. For example, the fear of being victims of a robbery. It is a situation that our “I-EGO” feels obfuscated by not having control over a situation like this, and while preventive measures can be taken that can even be very efficient, they are not enhanced correctly due to some personal inadequacy .
Another very big fear is the fear of the loss of someone we love and it is again the unconsciousness about impermanence that leads us to live with a continuous fear, on the surface or very deeply. Our overdeveloped ego is afraid of not being able to handle this situation, it is afraid of being left alone. Fear itself is anger over the absence of control in different situations, ignorance of cause and effect. Situations that are not as easy to control as running out of fuel in your car. Unconsciousness prevents us from learning from this fear process.
In our confusion and ignorance many of us usually look for a bodyguard, an amulet, a supernatural being that protects us.

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An important part of our evolution as human beings, our adaptation and survival was given thanks to the fear developed by the instinct of conservation, converting this feeling into an ally rather than an enemy.

When fear comes, we should just sit down and listen to it. Do not face it, do not fight with it. Open your mind and focus your consciousness to the detonator of fear, which provokes it, when it is possible that what causes it damages us and what we can do to move forward. As these steps are given the body relaxes, the walls that we create around us fall giving us more confidence and allowing us to advance freely and consciously.
Regularly fear appears before the unknown, and even when it is an already known experience, it is the ignorance of what originates what causes us impotence or courage. On many occasions what we fear is precisely where we should go and when we are attentive and listen, it perfectly indicates the path we must travel. The closer we get to fear, the more we connect with these dyes of value that we possess. Becoming our fear frees us from this suffering.
In these times when violence manifests itself every day (And which is also the product of fear) we see the world through the screen of fear which affects our daily decisions, our attitudes, our relationships. We are so busy creating an environment of safety at work, in our home, with those we love, that we finally neglect them by focusing on concerns rather than occupations. Definitely the danger exists but we can not live distracted in fear as the director of our life turning our life into a distorted reality, with an intuition overshadowed by feelings. We invest positive energy in negative achieving at the end of the day only a huge wear.
Performing a constant spiritual practice allows us to recognize our fears, those we know and those we did not know we possessed, being aware of them will not make them disappear like that, but it will allow us to be their teacher rather than being dominated by them. Because fear is not a bad feeling, neither is it, what makes them bad is the way in which we react to them, how we allow them to develop and the consequences that emanate from them through our unconsciousness.

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A life with fear keeps the mind tired and occupied, makes us doubt ourselves by keeping our days thinking that if what we do is right or wrong, if what we wear, what we eat, where we go is right or wrong. Thinking if the people around us are trying to do us good or bad. Carrying a life where fears dominate leads others around us to end up fearing being near us due to the projection of our uncontrolled and uncontrolled fears. We must be aware that we are not fear.

Most people who begin to practice mindfulness of fear realize for the first time how much of their behavior is motivated by this feeling. If this happens to you, you may begin to feel discouraged or possibly defensive, or firmly affirm that your fear is justified and even necessary. We are so used to fear and we have full knowledge of the reactions that we produce that we know how to manage our lives based on fears. It becomes something natural in our life to such a degree that we are afraid to live without fear.
Buddha recommended in the presence of fear the following: “Observe them, observe them carefully and closely. With continuous practice and with patience we will find that we have a force that motivates us and that is more powerful than fear or any other manifestation of it and is love Love can end our selfish attitude that is produced by a life dominated by fear. ”
Fear arises each time we experience a sense of separation from others or from the environment. We put aside the knowledge that everyone and everything around us are linked to ourselves or ourselves to our environment. Without realizing the fear makes us project what is unpleasant that is in ourselves and place it on others.
The more frequent our practice is, the more growth and spiritual strengthening the consciousness develops that our being is interconnected with all the manifestations of life around us. Understanding that there is no difference between the other and me, that we are the other, that there is no other then we will have understood the Dhamma and it is not possible for fear to regain control or space in our life.
Practicing love and kindness is an elixir against fear. Fear and all its manifestations: anxiety, panic, anger, low self-esteem or otherwise exceeded vanity, intolerance, distrust, among others with attention and care tend to disappear.

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Youth, health, material things are not permanent. Disappointments of any kind can occur but we must be aware that whoever fails us is projecting their own fears, their fault is not part of us and if for some reason we have not been careful and we encourage someone to abandon us or perform an attitude that hurt, we must also be aware of it, look into ourselves and strengthen our weaknesses always with love and compassion.
Always alert to what motivates that feeling, attentive to how long the sensation is, analyze if it is really convenient to allow it to develop or cut it off at that moment, not allow it to create unnecessary roots and begin to dominate our mind and senses.

>His Holiness the Dalai Lama
Question: How can one work with deep fears most effectively?
His Holiness : There are quite a number of methods. The first is to think about actions and their effects. Usually when something bad happens, we say, “Oh, very unlucky,” and when something good happens, we say, “Oh, very lucky.” Actually, these two words, lucky and unlucky, are insufficient. There must be some reason. Because of a reason, a certain time became lucky or unlucky, but usually we do not go beyond lucky or unlucky. The reason, according to the Buddhist explanation, is our past karma, our actions.
One way to work with deep fears is to think that the fear comes as a result of your own actions in the past. Further, if you have fear of some pain or suffering, you should examine whether there is anything you can do about it. If you can, there is no need to worry about it; if you cannot do anything, then there is also no need to worry.
Another technique is to investigate who is becoming afraid. Examine the nature of your self. Where is this I? Who is I? What is the nature of I? Is there an I besides my physical body and my consciousness? This may help.
Also, someone who is engaging in the Bodhisattva practices seeks to take others’ suffering onto himself or herself. When you have fear, you can think, “Others have fear similar to this; may I take to myself all of their fears.” Even though you are opening yourself to greater suffering, taking greater suffering to yourself, your fear lessens.
A Policy of Kindness: An Anthology of Writings By and About the Dalai Lama<<

Namaste _(“)_

The thin line between humility and pride

By Sukheti

Even when both feelings are projected with opposing attitudes, between pride and humility there is a very thin line of crossing and confusing.

Humble people are happy because they understand the meaning of life. Those who are humble want others to reveal their talents, their virtues and ultimately surpass them, while the proud need others to feel continually “inferior” so that they can protect their own self-esteem (fragile ego) and hide their own deep anxiety.

When you genuinely know your own brilliance, you are not trying to be superior, because you are sure that the light that resides in others is like your own. If we are not able to see the greatness of others it is because we are looking at our limitations.

Pride is a shield that keeps us on guard before others. His sister, the proud tells us all the time that we are more than the others. In this way we limit our learning.

Some people wonder why we Buddhists prostrate ourselves so often and that is why it represents a practice that makes us humble, it is true, we show respect for Buddha but it is also a practice of humility, we bow our heads with it in mind. In our Mind lies, ignorance, attachment and other feelings so there is no reason to be arrogant.

Humility, quite simply, is the absence of pride.2cf7db275e64460e6fab736163a796c4--christian-encouragement-god-is-love

If there is no pride, our relationships with others are face to face, it is a frank interaction. No one is using your message to put anyone down, and no one has to go down or up to the other person’s level. Everything is face to face.

When our humility is due to the fear of sin, the punishment or the suffering that will bring us, then our humility may not be sincere. Buddhism recommends practicing humility 24/7, when we do it we feel full of it, it is like having a good meal and exercise, we feel healthy and good. Explaining it in this way suggests that we are proud to be humble. It is a dichotomy of feeling so good for doing or practicing kindness and humility. That’s why I mentioned that between the two there is a very thin line.

Keeping me for some time in practice has made me a kinder person both to myself and to others. However, one of the biggest obstacles for me has been the renunciation of pride.

The mother of pride, arrogance, anger and everything that makes us create problems is the ignorance that is not knowing and not wanting to know. The deepest level of ignorance refers to the lack of wisdom or insight into the nature of reality.

Ignorance, or not having true wisdom, is at the root of all our problems, to the fact that we are not fully enlightened like the Buddhas, who only experience bliss and do not suffer or frustrate.

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The path to a full realization of this wisdom is often very long, and may require more than one life, but it needs us to take a first step and is in practice, meditation. That space in which we quiet our mind to hear the most important voice: The voice of our being. This step will lead us to others in which we will invariably recognize our feelings, their source and their impermanence. In recognizing impermanence we can understand that such feelings are not part of us and occur because we are subject to the five aggregates.

Pride is one of the ego’s favorite manifestations. I have found many arrogant people on the path. They feel that being in a spiritual practice validates them to be someone because they are or because they are not. They take the path for reasons and motives different from the objectives of the practice. Many need to feel special and important.

Sitting for a few months or a few years does not mean that you have transcended your ego. Doing the practice is not limited to the time we sit, we must take practice to daily life – slowly, little by little the ego begins to fall – after training our mind and tune it with our actions is when a new understanding and vision of life begins to take shape, then we can exchange our happiness for the happiness of others. Through genuine empathy and compassion we begin to truly live the Bodhisattva’s vows and want to liberate not only ourselves but all others in the world of samasara. We look like one with everyone. We finally understand the right view and the concept of emptiness. Understanding that the way you see the world comes from the heart and not from the mind.

Love, parenting and detachment

By Sukheti

During my youth, I argued in all possible ways that I would never be a mother. The idea of ​​having responsibility for a life in my hands terrified me. A saying goes: Do not spit up because it will fall on your face. When I was 28 years old, Tabitha was born and, with her, the responsibilities arrived. But more than that, I discovered that what really caused me panic was the love so immense that my heart experienced At 30 my son Ruben arrived and with him was enough for me.

Being a parent is a job for which there is no age at which we are really ready. Worse still when we have confused concepts about what love is, what discipline, which means to educate is.

In those years I did not practice Buddhism. I did not know the dhamma. But I was always very observant and discovered that the more attached I was to my children and they to me, the greater opportunities of suffering we would feel as they grew.

Contrary to what most people think, understanding detachment is one of the greatest signs of love. Because what is really loved is left free is not about owning it.

The key in all relationship starts with love and compassion.

Who understand love and compassion understand freedom.

Who understand freedom understand respect.

Who respect all around don’t need rules or restrictions, guilt and punishments.

Attachment is all about me and what I can get from you, and love is all I can give or do for you.

We confuse what love means and even classify it into different types of love. In his great goodness Buddha explains and clearly distinguishes how love is: “When you like a flower you pluck the flower, when you love the flower you let the flower remain. Who understands this understands life.”13579209_1472428637.2043 - copia

If we understand that we live this life Samsara also understand that fatherhood makes us guides and teachers, we just have no vacation, there are no breaks, it is not possible to activate a computer program that guides them step by step about how and what is life. Watching our children grow, giving them our time and care can easily make us fall into attachment, so we must keep in mind that even when they come from us they are independent beings and that as long as we respect them, we will also be respecting ourselves, So maintaining a relationship based on compassion and love allows us to develop spaces of appreciation of what happens when interacting with us giving way to wisdom.

Our children are like floating eyes watching us and assimilating everything we say and what we do not say as well. They carry our genetic information, imitate us and for better or for worse, everything they learn and assimilate will evolve.

So my daily practice was and is fundamental to keep me in a middle point in the arduous office of being single mother.

Every stage in my children’s lives, their challenges, their stumbling blocks, their triumphs and failures during their childhood and adolescence (maybe even now), have manifested everything they learned from me and all their environment, this being a reason for continuous practice representing for me The best way to be prepared for each new challenge. Before each new experience, the children look for us, their parents, which must be the way to face the situations and we must be firm and attentive.

In the same way that I take refuge in Budha, the Dhamma and the Sangha, I take refuge every morning in the Buddha who dwells in me, in the Dhamma by remaining conscious to the teachings that in two ways develop between my children and I always having Present compassion as a guide and in the Sangha that my small family represents. Each of us are to support each other when one is weak and to remind us that love is what holds us together.

The way to love with all your heart and to let go is the foundation of your daily practice.

Even when some Buddhists say that in practice, parternity is totally useless, especially because of the attachment to which it exposes us, in my case I must recognize that mother showed me clearly that one can love another being unconditionally, disinterestedly. And that same love showed me that what you love is not possessed.The-Buddha-named-his-son-Rahula-or

When I take the path of secular Buddhist as my way of life, take also 5 basic precepts. Precepts are not norms nor commandments. There is no higher being who watches from above to see if we are on the right path. Unlike other lists, the five precepts do not indicate “what all Buddhists should do”, but are adopted on a voluntary basis as “training principles”. The five precepts are:

I accept the principle of training to abstain from killing.

I accept the principle of training not to take what has not been given to me.

I accept the principle of training away from sexual misconduct.

I accept the principle of training away from lying.

I accept the principle of training to abstain from ingesting intoxicants.

 

The practical interpretation of these precepts in my life and as a mother are translated in this way:

With actions of love and goodness I purify my body.

With generosity I purify my body.

With tranquility, simplicity and contentment I purify my body.

With truthful communication I purify my speech.

With a clear and lucid conscience I purify my mind.

And in this same order I have developed the maternal task.

It has been a continuous practice to pay attention to my actions and words. The way I do it must come out of love and compassion. What we do before the eyes of our children is magnified.

Because I always had to work the time I dedicated to my children was little, so expressing love, lavish to caress, listen, reprimand or laugh are always genuine expressions and mindfulness for each one. Some people used to tell me that I was spoiling my children by giving them so much, I just told them that there is a time for everything. The time of pampering, caring or trying to provide good education, food or clothing was that. Some day they grow up and leave and it will no longer be possible to give them those signs of love that will make them safe in adulthood. Just as one day they sought our support and comfort. One day they begin to move away and we must be prepared to know that we have done the right thing and see their departure with the tranquility of knowing that they will know how to conduct themselves in the world. Both sides will accept the change.

Without a doubt one of the greatest teachings and the most difficult for many to understand is the one expressed in this way:

“You can search throughout the entire universe for someone who is more deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself, and that person is not to be found anywhere. You yourself, as anybody in the entire universe deserve your love and affection . ”   Buddha

A person who loves himself has a lot to offer, someone who loves himself does not hurt others.

In short, our children will be more likely to take a place in the world if they know about respect, safety, being aware, standing firm but not afraid of change. All this is possible if in knowing these small new beings, we are humble enough to contemplate that teaching will not be giving us based on our wisdom. Each day we will learn something. Each new challenge will represent more and more the firm conviction of remaining in the path of continuous practice, love, compassion, equanimity, respect, patience and freedom.

I still do not know if my work has been a success. Because it is not something that I can qualify. I can only attest that I have loved to measure and without condition and I am happy to have known them and to continue watching them grow.